Looking back now, my way to “A Course in Miracles” probably all started in 1969 when I accepted Jesus my personal Lord and Savior, beneath the influence of the Campus Crusade for Christ. However, after joining a Christian brotherhood of aspiring monks, where I was daily quizzed how many Bible verses I had memorized and could recite verbatim, I was totally confused because of it all. Their version of reality just didn’t sit well with me. I felt such as for instance a parrot of Bible verses, that I didn’t even begin to know, or the town crier that nobody desired to hear. Jesus would show me more, much more.
As divine synchronicity might have it, I ingested a hallucinogen that triggered a near death experience your day after Christmas, 1970. When I was in the black void, with only the consciousness that “I Am”, George Harrison’s song My Sweet Lord began playing. That has been my voice singing to God, not George’s! Soon an excellent white light began appearing from the darkness, as my soul sang “I really want to help you Lord “.Then somebody started to emerge from the light. This Holy One oscillated between masculine and feminine. As I’d been praying to Jesus, I thought it could be him, but with out a beard. I started crying from the depths of my soul, since the Holy One communicated telepathically into my heart. I knew this Being to be nothing but pure love. Then it absolutely was over. I was shot back into my body, hearing the language to a new song telling me “it’s been quite a while coming, it’s going to be quite a while gone.” How true that has been.
Annually later, I saw the cover of Autobiography of a Yogi. It had been Paramahansa Yogananda who’d come to me! Next came meeting Baba Ram Dass, who confirmed that I wasn’t crazy and stated that Yogananda had appeared to numerous young spiritual seekers on drugs. He also autographed my copy of Be Here Now. My next decade was spent becoming an aspiring yogi and practicing Yogananda’s Self-Realization Fellowship lessons and exercises, chanting, meditating and receiving initiation into Kriya yoga. Yogananda’s path and linage of gurus brought the essential clarity for me personally to know Jesus and Christianity better. Yogananda also showed me the primary truth behind the oneness of all religions. a course in miracles online retreats And he brought me to Babaji, the Mahavatar who sent him to America in the 1920s. Ever since I heard the name Babaji, I knew I knew Him. He and Jesus work together, behind the scenes, in the cosmic scheme of things. And Babaji was to be the next thing in my ongoing spiritual evolution. However, I didn’t know at this time that He had supposedly manifested a body again and was residing in the small village of Haidakhan, in northern India. That would come later, along with the mystery and myth of this current manifestation.
After hearing Bhagavan Das sing, I bought a dotara and began chanting mantras to God daily. This simple, ancient two- stringed instrument is straightforward to play and lets one follow the drone sound into silence. At this point, I purchased my own invest the woods and met a man who’d lived with Babaji. He conducted a Vedic fire ceremony that Babaji had taught him to initiate my new abode. I questioned and grilled him repeatedly, asking if this new Babaji was the same entity Yogananda had written about. Yes, one and the same but peoples egos still question His true identity. Babaji’s new Kriya yoga was the trail of truth, simplicity and love while performing karma yoga- work – and keeping one’s mind on God, through repetition of the ancient mantra Om Namaha Shivaya. Babaji stated that mantra alone was more powerful than one thousand atomic bombs and His 1-800 number. I started at this time seriously doing japa, or the repetition of the mantra on 108 rudraksha beads, to get this vibration into my sub consciousness. I also learned many ways to chant it on my dotara. With this going on, I bought “A Course in Miracles” and began the daily lessons immediately. I tried to create sense of the Text but got nowhere; each sentence bogged me down and must be re-read over too many times to assimilate. I was just too young, I told myself. I was thirty-three. I’d deal with this particular Text later, someday, maybe.
Then following a year of being married, our home burns down- an actual karmic fire ceremony. In the ashes, untouched by the fire, was an image of Babaji and His cymbals from Haidakhan. Discuss miracles! Next, was the unexpected news that individuals have a child coming, after losing everything? My marriage started to dissolve quickly after I fell twenty feet off a roof, breaking my body in twelve places. Surviving death, I was put back into college for 2 yrs to be retrained, while my ex-wife and son left for the Southwest. That is when all my abandonment issues resulted in extreme drinking alone. After graduation, I left for India to see Babaji’s ashram, as He had already left His physical body again, and to pray for help with my entire life in probably the most spiritual country on earth. I attended the 1995 Kumbha Mela festival with ten million others and lo and behold, who should appear? It had been Babaji, asking me if I was having fun. Yes, but I couldn’t talk to answer Him! Then He disappeared back into the crowd, leaving me blown away. Returning state side, I wound up following my ex- wife and son to the Southwest, where my alternative was peyote meetings with the Native Americans for many years to come. Everything I’d read and studied in the Course was evident on the medicine inside that tipi. God Is. I learned more in a single night than I had in years of studying metaphysical books. But I didn’t practice all I’d learned and I let my depressed ego, alcohol and abandonment issues take me closer to death’s very door. However, as fate, karma and prayers might have it, I wound up in prison for 2.5 years on an aggravated DUI, rather than dead, where I stumbled upon the Courses’Manual for Teachers in our library. Soon, I had the entire book submitted free to prisoners and was reintroduced to Jesus again, with all the time I wanted to examine every word of the lengthy text. After two decades, I must certanly be old enough to get it now! With time and with assistance from the Course, I was finally in a position to forgive myself for the bizarre life my ego had constructed. I did the daily lessons again, attempting to see the facial skin of Christ within each inmate. That has been no easy one. But I left prison a changed, free sober man, far better for the ability and with an initial draft book about it all under my belt. Today, I’ve eight years of sobriety under my belt and my book Still Singing, Somehow won the fall Pinnacle Book Achievement Award. This is a very condensed version of my story- an odyssey of 1 soul’s karma.